The Flash Deserves Fairer Treatment Than It Got, Even With That Baby in a Microwave

Overall, I kind of like The Flash. I think the story structure is pretty strong, the direction is pretty strong, and there was a lot of humor and a lot of emotion and catharsis in it that I genuinely enjoyed. It has real problems. Some of the VFX, some of the plotting and some of the acting choices did not work for me. I was not crazy about the post credit scene. Putting a baby in a microwave is something I just cannot rationalize in any context.

I was surprised the CinemaScore was a B, but that is the score I would have given it. I don't agree with the claims that it was the best superhero movie of all time. I think part of the problem was expectations: so many public figures, from Tom Cruise to Stephen King to James Gunn, tweeted insanely positive praise that it fed the natural cynicism on social media. Many people went in with their arms crossed, looking for problems. My own screening was mostly fans who had lined up for hours, and they loved it. I found Ezra Miller's performance kind of cringey and almost unwatchable in some moments, but that was not the case for everyone around me.

Andy Muschietti And Christina Hodson Are Not The Problem With The Flash

The film spent about a decade in development, with Robert Zemeckis and, I think, Rick Famuyiwa attached at points. It landed with Andy Muschietti, who directed both It films for Warner, and Christina Hodson, who wrote Bumblebee. It is not fair to call him a bad director or her a bad writer. The structure, pacing, editing, dialogue and concepts are successful. Where it fails, I think, is in the casting, the studio's decision to throw cameos and weird VFX at us in the closing sequence, an ending that lands in a weird place, and some of the VFX execution. Most of that is fairly forgivable. I didn't think it deserved to be making only 55 million dollars; I thought it should have been a 100 million dollar movie.

A lot of different groups were rooting for it to fail, and I understand people not wanting to pay for it. Some had issues with Ezra Miller, and there was a reason Ezra was not put on a publicity tour, though the film had gone too far to recast with multiple Barrys on screen. Others objected to Warner cancelling Batgirl, which I called incredibly stupid, while spending at least 100 million dollars on marketing, probably more, including a Super Bowl spot. Some objected to James Gunn taking over DC Films, which I am personally optimistic about. There are Snyder loyalists, a movement I don't think is fair to call a cult, with negative aspects but also a lot of well meaning people. Some disagree with Ezra Miller's gender identity, and some Arrowverse fans felt an injustice because Grant Gustin got no cameo.

The Opening Batman Sequence Won Me Over, Babies Aside

I like how the film jumps straight into an action scene in the DCEU continuity as we know it, showing Barry's relationship with Bruce Wayne. Filby's Cafe is a reference to H.G. Wells' The Time Machine. It is one of the coolest Ben Affleck Batman sequences we've seen, at least top five, and Jeremy Irons is an underutilized, amazing actor. But the hospital scene is where I first thought, uh oh, what is this movie? Babies in free fall, one caught in a bed pan, one in a microwave. Why not a big blanket to catch them all?

The Wonder Woman cameo is diminishing returns at this point; the coolest thing about it is the music, and that's nothing against Gal Gadot. I also prefer heroes nobody recognizes over actors hired to freak out as fans. As for who killed Nora Allen, I believe Andy Muschietti said that in his mind it is Reverse Flash. One idea I find cool is that a Barry must exist in the future to make sure history goes the way it does, and that could be our Barry. On the yellow lightning, I think Bruce's new suit filters it gold, but it wasn't really explained.

The Chronobowl Was A Great Concept With Execution That Looked Too Artificial

I think the Chronobowl was well conceived and storyboarded. As a visual learner, I like a spectrum of moments in time laid out at a glance. But it looked way too artificial, "like a PS3 cutscene". I hear Muschietti's defense that he wanted it to feel like Barry's own underwater world rather than reality, but if you want a dollhouse aesthetic you have to lean into it: prosthetic dummies, flat or translucent figures. Even Nolan, in Interstellar, lit those moments to look like memories.

The same applies to the multiverse montage. Had we seen archive clips of Christopher Reeve from the Richard Donner films, I think people would have been okay with it. Instead they recreated him with CGI, with a green glow he never had, reacting to the rift, and it looks really spooky. I also think the film left out a lot from Flashpoint that it could have used: the Speed Force treadmill, Reverse Flash, and the Thomas Wayne letter, the most emotional part. I understand why, since that would make it more of a Batman movie.

Why I Think Stephen King Loved The Flash, And Where It Ranks

My theory on Stephen King's praise is, first, that Muschietti made him a huge amount of money, since the It films are by far the most profitable King adaptations. Second, Barry phases through a Raquel Welch poster from One Million Years B.C., which has got to be a reference to Shawshank Redemption. I don't think I've seen that phasing enough in live action, and it looked really cool.

It is not even the best superhero movie of the summer. For me it goes Across the Spider-Verse, Guardians Vol. 3, then The Flash after probably a big drop off, but still better than Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania, which was "a real stinker of a movie."

Critics Should Judge The Craft, Not The Controversy

Chris Stuckmann had a good take: nowadays we have no more nuance when talking about movies. I think even veteran critics feel pressure to have a binary hot take to be on the right side of history. I can't rationalize calling this a two or three out of 10. I think Muschietti deserves to direct the next Batman movie or some other big movie, and Hodson should keep writing. If you object to Ezra Miller, the end of the Snyderverse or Warner's slate, I understand, but that doesn't make Hodson a bad writer or Muschietti a bad director. I spent a lot of time reading Roger Ebert, and I want to pay respect to the people who tried to make a film, while calling out shortcuts.

Can you separate the drama around The Flash from the craft that went into it?

Young Barry Is Annoying in a Way That Isn't Cute

Where I really had trouble with The Flash is the two Barrys. I think young Barry, the way Ezra played him, is just so annoying, and not in a way that is cute or fun. You could say Tom Holland's Peter Parker is kind of annoying in No Way Home and some of the Avengers movies, but he is annoying in a way that endears the character to you. Sidekicks can be annoying, but they are meant to be more fun. It is a delicate balance, and I don't think they struck it at all. It forces old Barry to become a character he is not at all in the opening act, and the film really loses me there.

I didn't care for the roommates scene at all. All I really liked was the Eric Stoltz argument, because I love the history of recasting Eric Stoltz with Michael J. Fox. But it raises the question of who this movie is for, because I think a lot of people don't know that story. Same with Nicolas Cage's Superman fighting the giant spider. I lost my mind and applauded, and the whole group I saw it with loved it, but I think a lot of people were left wondering why Cage was playing Superman. You have to follow Kevin Smith to know that Hollywood history. Once you do, it's hilarious.

As for Shazam 2, I would rank it at the bottom. To me it is the worst of the high profile superhero movies that came out in 2023, mostly because of how Zachary Levi played the adult Shazam against Asher Angel's emotional scenes. He didn't do that badly in the 2019 movie, so I don't understand what happened.

The Zod Timeline Throws Off the Pacing

One issue with the writing might just be a pacing thing. Zod arrives and the world engine starts destroying Metropolis, and they take a taxi cab from Central City to Gotham. We saw at the start that Barry had to cross desert, a mountain pass and a mountain lake to make that trip, so it must have taken hours. Then they have a long spaghetti conversation with Bruce Wayne, scroll slowly through locations in the Batcave, and fly to Siberia, arriving at night and leaving in the morning. They keep checking the news while the world engine plows away at the city. The pacing threw me off a little.

Michael Keaton Is a Delight, and I Wanted More

Michael Keaton is delightful in this movie, and I wish there was more of him. I think because of all of Ezra Miller's issues, they had to use Keaton heavily in the marketing, setting an expectation of a Keaton Batman movie, and it only really was in the second act. This might just be me, but I feel like one of Muschietti's favourite movies has to be Multiplicity, where Keaton duplicates himself and each copy of a copy is a little off. I think that is the approach to younger Barry, who is played really dumb. But Barry was already smart as a kid of maybe 10 or 11, working out different ways to get 24. I just don't think he would be this dumb.

This is when the movie started cooking for me. The return to the Batcave and Danny Elfman's music got me going. The Siberia action is not the best Batman action we have seen, but it works for me. The only weird thing is the finishing move. What works in The Matrix and John Wick is escalation, where each opponent is tougher than the last. Instead this sequence ends with a whimper. Still, kudos to the stunt team and Keaton's stunt double.

Sasha Calle's Supergirl Deserved a Bigger Role

Sasha Calle's Kara Zor-El is a lot of fun, and I hope they find a way to bring her back, because I thought she was excellent. My favourite part of her long take is when she blocks a bullet heading for Bruce's face, the one spot his suit doesn't protect. The Russian lettering on her sack translates to the most dangerous, which makes it seem like there might be other metahumans or high security prisoners held there. I also like how hard she goes against Zod, grabbing a pole and driving it right into his face. It was just really fun. It made me want more of a movie with her.

Regaining Barry's Powers Felt Too Easy

Having Barry lose his powers just to regain them through a Benjamin Franklin kite experiment felt forced. Superhero origins are supposed to be accidental to the point where they could be impossible to recreate, so why make him lose them at all? I think it might have been more fun if both Barrys kept their powers and raced each other.

Some people called it disrespectful for young Barry to turn Keaton's bat suit into a Flash suit. I like it, because Batman designed those suits as horror instruments to strike fear into Gotham's villains, and as young Barry becomes Dark Flash, it builds on that horror imagery. The desert battle is fun, but the VFX lacks weight and texture; the lighting feels like a green screen set, and young Barry barely reacts to being impaled. I do think the silly spinning move the two Barrys do was by design. When the film loops back, they recognise how indulgent it was, and that is when they go to help Kara and Bruce.

A Flashpoint Adaptation Would Have Been Better

Some people have asked why the film didn't stick to the 2011 Flashpoint comics, and I agree it would have been a better story, and they could afford it. I would have preferred Jeffrey Dean Morgan as Thomas Wayne mentoring Barry. Maybe he wasn't available, but they recast Henry Allen. Still, judging the film they made, I think it is at least a six, maybe a seven out of 10. Unfortunately, I don't think Ezra Miller did a great job, and that holds the film back.

The Chronobowl is where I think the final act lost a lot of folks. The tesseract in Interstellar works because Nolan thought through how it would look, feel and sound. Here there is so much colour and VFX that you don't sense what the characters feel. The concept of a time Coliseum is really cool, and whoever sketched it deserves credit, but simpler projections, like in Minority Report, could have worked. I loved the Cage moment, but I don't think they needed to re-puppet Christopher Reeve, and I understand why people feel miffed. George Reeves' cameo was so quick that it didn't bother me. Apparently Teddy Sears says he doesn't remember shooting anything, and I'm still trying to figure out what they did. Ending with George Clooney's Batman feels like a wink that, in many people's minds, banishes Barry to an alternate reality.

Barry Never Learns His Lesson

On Dark Flash, I would have preferred Reverse Flash, and I don't think Zod is the best villain for Barry either. As for Barry moving the cans, maybe he is that naive, but I agree he didn't learn his lesson. I don't think we will see Ezra again for a long while, which is why I am okay with people going to see it. The nostalgia only comes late in a film that runs over two hours, and the Keaton nostalgia I liked.

I don't think we overanalyse movies. People talk about them too much and think too little, and asking whether I simply enjoyed it misses how criticism works. Roger Ebert would fundamentally get to the core of what was wrong in a movie, and I think not enough critics are allowing themselves to give a bad review now. Is a six or seven out of 10 the fair verdict on The Flash?